5 Ways To Make Your Ex Regret BREAKING UP With YOU (Not What You Think!)

About this video

Clark Kegley frames a breakup as painful and identity-shattering, based on his own rough breakup a few years earlier, but also as a chance to step into a new identity. Even if the initial motivation is making an ex regret the split, he presents five reframes that are all investments in yourself. First, use the pain as fuel to prove them wrong and build something, rather than wallowing. Second, channel the energy into fixing yourself — working out, style, appearance, and other fixable things he says are often more changeable than people think, citing fixing his own teeth. Third, fall in love with yourself and become self-full rather than needy, because, in his phrasing, tens attract tens and non-neediness is attractive. Fourth, treat the ex as metaphorically dead to you: rip off the band-aid, do not try to work through the breakup together, and accept that death precedes rebirth and love is not finite. Fifth, use a Tony Robbins exercise he describes: write down your dream partner in physical and emotional detail on one side of a page, and on the other, who you need to become to attract that person.

Key takeaways

• Use breakup pain as motivation and channel it into building and improving, rather than bingeing, drinking, or self-pity, Kegley urges.
• Channel energy into fixable self-improvements such as fitness, style, and appearance as a concrete starting point.
• Become self-full and less needy by loving yourself; Kegley argues this attracts higher-caliber partners.
• Cut contact and treat the ex as metaphorically dead to you — spending energy on the past wastes energy needed for the future.
• Write your dream partner’s traits on one side of a page and who you must become to attract them on the other, per the exercise Kegley attributes to Tony Robbins via a contact.

Episode details: published February 14, 2020 · 13:48 long. Summary written by Self Growth Videos from the episode itself. Business results and any income figures mentioned are Clark Kegley’s own claims, shared for education — they are not typical or guaranteed.

← Previous: The Ultimate Guide to Keeping A Journal (2020) · Next: Paul Chek on Self-Love, The Universe, and the Future of Life [FULL PODCAST] →

All Clark Kegley videos · Clark Kegley profile · Clark Kegley on YouTube