This Site Is A Special Thank You & Introduction To Some Outstanding Men & Women!

"Your story should not be your fortress but rather your fuel." - Lisa Nichols
"The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing." -Walt Disney
"When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on." -Franklin D. Roosevelt
"Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant." -Robert Louis Stevenson
Dreams grow if you grow. Zig Ziglar
"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." -Ralph Waldo Emerson
"The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall." -Nelson Mandela
"In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years." -Abraham Lincoln
"Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood." -Ralph Waldo Emerson
"The only impossible journey is the one you never begin." -Tony Robbins
"Love the life you live. Live the life you love." -Bob Marley
"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all." -Helen Keller
If you judge people, you have no time to love them. Mother Teresa
All that we are is the result of what we have thought. Buddha
Stay hungry, stay foolish. Steve Jobs
The future belongs to those who prepare for it today. Malcolm X
Some people do really find fault like there's a reward for it. Zig Ziglar
It always seems impossible until it’s done. Nelson Mandela
Turn your wounds into wisdom. Oprah Winfrey
Whatever you are, be a good one. Abraham Lincoln
Do what you can, with what you have, where you are. Theodore Roosevelt
Little by little, one travels far. J.R.R. Tolkien
I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who has practiced one kick 10,000 times. Bruce Lee
A man who stands for nothing will fall for anything. Malcolm X
You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength. Marcus Aurelius
By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail. Benjamin Franklin
I think, therefore I am. René Descartes
To be, or not to be, that is the question. William Shakespeare
A lot of people quit looking for work as soon as they find a job. Zig Ziglar
Live life like your the hero in the story.
Previous slide
Next slide

SS: Life Advice To Change your Future

Share This:



so here's a little issue we have in America today there are currently about 250,000 people a year who were dying in our hospitals due to due to preventable deaths and I'm not talking about negligence I'm talking about little accidents right I'm talking about the doctor in the morning not properly briefing the doctor for the evening you know I'm talking about things that you know we can't sue anybody there's nothing there's nothing that we can see that's wrong but there's 250,000 preventable deaths every year that's about 20 747s going down every single week that's what's the equivalent to and the confusing thing is that we have the best doctors in the world we have the most advanced technology in the world some of the medical equipment we have is the best in the world the medicines we have are the best in the world so you start asking yourselves why are these things happening and the reason is not because of any of those things the reasons are actually something vastly more simple and something very very human five percent of hospital administrators are doctors most of them are number crunchers hospitals are run like businesses hospitals are run by the numbers and the problem isn't the people who are giving the care they're very highly trained the problem is the way those people are cared for because what we've done is we've created cultures and hospitals where the people who are doing the caring aren't cared for and so all of these little preventable deaths are happening because they don't feel like they're a part of anything they're just doing their jobs and they don't get along that well and there's not a lot of camaraderie and the impact is death right now I use this example because it's exaggerated because the impact is so powerful but the problem is the same in our own companies right which is we come to work and we're told you must care for your clients you must care for your customers you must make than the focus of all you do and yet why aren't the people who are managing us from the top caring about us so yes in a hospital the impact is worse but the impact that we're having on the outside world is just as bad in other words we're not working at our best we don't care for the things we're doing we're not helping each other is the most important part and the residual impact is that we are unfulfilled by the work that we do and when we run fulfilled by the work that we do we focus on the details and when we focus on the details we retract from each other when we track from each other we feel lonely and when we feel lonely cancer goes up heart disease goes up diabetes goes up in other words by going to work we're killing ourselves literally there's another study that was released not that long ago that says that parents who work late the negative impact that it has on their children is little to none they may feel guilty as parents but the negative impact that it has on the raising of their children is little to none however parents who come home from jobs they hate or don't love their kids are more likely to be bullies at school and now you think about the bullying epidemic we have in America right where there's this disturbing number of young children who are killing themselves suicides because of bullies the problem is not the schools and the problem isn't even the parenting the problem is the jobs the parents have this is the importance and this is the power of the work that we do in the places we go to work right most of us mean like we listen to the the the unemployment statistics they say you know we're all-time high record high nine to ten percent unemployment right and people go Mike oh that's terrible and I hear that number and I go well that means ninety-one percent still have a job right now granted we want to get that employment number up but that means ninety-one percent are still going to work the question is how many of them coming home fulfilled by the work that they do and how many of them are waking up inspired to go back to work the next day if we don't love our works we don't look out for each other if we don't look out for each other we feel lonely if we don't feel lonely all these negative things happen so what example can I share with a creative audience about how to change this the United States Marine Corps I had the great honor last week of spending a week with the Marines I spent a couple days at Camp Lejeune and then I went for a few days to Parris Island to watch them go through boot camp and this isn't a room it's a remarkable remarkable human experiment that they're doing and even though they know what works they don't know why it works but they don't need to know why because they know that it works right but what's happening is they're taking a group of strangers people who don't know each other who were showing up and within a very very short period of time learn to trust each other so much that they would give their lives for each other right and we know everyone sort of anyone who's ever worn a human reform knows that no one runs into battle for God and country it doesn't happen it's for the guy to the left of me and the guy to the right of me that's the reason they do what they do right and these sort of remarkable stories of heroism where people rush into very very dangerous situations to save others and they always ask the question why did you do it why would you risk your life why would you put yourself at risk for them and the answer is always the same because they would do it for me in other words what gives them the confidence to put themselves at great risk is the knowledge that someone would do the same for them we would put ourselves a great risk for our companies if we knew that our companies would put themselves a great risk for us but they don't so we don't now one of the things that's remarkable about the Marines and if you go read and you know this is the most I asked these young and they're 21 22 years old some of these of these lance corporals the grunts you know the guys the infantry I mean this is the lowest of the low the ones we actually send in to battle the frontlines and I asked them are you misunderstood in America and they said yes unanimously they all nodded I said what what do people think of you and one stood up and says they think we're baby killers I said how does it feel he says it hurts and when I say we'll tell me a story then that captures to you what it means to be a Marine the feeling you have of being a Marine tell me a story that captures it and I expected to hear stories of I took a hit and somebody save me or I ran into a firefight and pulled something I expected these stories of heroism not a single story like came out and I'm sure those stories exist but those aren't that all the stories they told me that capture what it means to be a Marine one of the stories they told me was a young boy in Afghanistan who would come around every morning and sell kebabs to the Marines and then one day he showed up and he was all beaten up and he didn't go to his parents for help and he didn't go to his friends to help he came to the Marines for help because he trusted them more than anyone else they told me a story that captured how they feel of a sevilla CH that had been overrun by the Taliban and the residents of the village could couldn't go home because they would be killed by the Taliban and so they were just living by the river the problem was winter was coming and one of the the elders came to the Marines knocked on the door and said I need you to come down to the river and kill us and the Marine said what are you talking about he says if we go back home we'll be killed by the Taliban and if we stay out there we're gonna die slow deaths this winter it's easier if you just come and kill us please the Marines overran the Taliban village pushed the Taliban out a year later they went back to this village and people were playing volleyball these were the stories they told me that capture what it means to be a Marine they believed in doing good for others and the fulfillment they get when they put themselves at risk so that others may prevail is overwhelming this is not unique to the Marine Corps this is all human beings the feeling of fulfillment comes from doing something for another the feeling from fulfillment comes from the exertion of time and energy for someone else if you are walking to work and you throw a few pennies in a cup and you come to work and you say to your friends hey guys I gave a dollar to somebody homeless this morning what are your friends going to say yeah good right I gave 20 bucks to somebody homeless they'd be like yeah good for you right what have you come in in the morning you say hey I gave up my Saturday and I went and paid missus painted a school in the inner city people go whoa cool wow cool and all of a sudden not only are they inspired to do something good themselves but the feeling that that you have persists the amazing thing is when we do good for others it actually inspires others to do good for others this is provided for us prymatt illogically anthropologically it's a all part of the survival of the species you know sex feels good so that will do it so we can procreate and perpetuate the species but we're social animals and so we have to provide for the fact that we'll maintain strong bonds and build cultures right because that's what humans do were cultural animals and so when we do good for others and we look out for those in our tribe we look out for those in our group it actually feels good biologically releases oxytocin this chemical that's released when you do good for others is released and it makes you feel good the amazing thing is the more oxytocin and you have in your body the more you want to do good for others the problem is we've replaced this feeling the exertion of time and energy with digital communications we've replaced it with headphones we've replaced it with money right think about the invention of money right it used to be money you know used to be like you go to someone's house you cook them dinner and the deal was they'll do the dishes time and energy exchange for time and energy and someone said I'll give you an IOU right someone says I don't feel like doing the dishes so I'm gonna give you an IOU that I promised to do them another day right and that's what money is it is the promise for future goods or services the promise of future goods and services in other words we've replaced our own time and energy with promises for someone else to do it another day right in other words there's no exertion of time and energy and so the feeling people get is that I did something for you and you did nothing for me you replaced it with a piece of paper with an eye are you with a promise for future goods and services the way we find fulfillment is by doing good for others so how do the Marines or how do you get people to do good for others we all know this intellectually we know that it's good to do good for others but why don't we do it then why don't we do it and what the Marines learned is something that I completely did not expect they can't just yell at these guys to help each other that's not what happens there's a few things that they have to do first so we all heard of the obstacle course right the Marines have a thing called the obstacle course and this is where they they build an aerobic strength and aerobic strength muscle strength and it's timed and all of this good stuff they have another course called the confidence course and it's never timed and most of the obstacles on this course cannot be completed by yourself they must be completed in teams you have no choice that's just how it's designed and what they say is the first two weeks of boot camp everybody is there to outdo each other and prove that they're strong just kind of like when we start in a job with proof we want to show how great we are we'll work a little hard it will do good work look how good my design is right it's all about us and how good we are right but they keep putting them in situations where they can't do things by themselves and what starts to happen very slowly they said after about two weeks they start cheering for each other now they get in trouble when they do but they start cheering for each other and then before too long you see them organically start helping each other and what happens is if there's one person who's weak and refuses to help each other the others or even if there's one person who's strong who's you know I was the star college athlete and they get to every the end of every obstacle they just stand there and wait for everybody to finish and they don't help each other what starts to happen as organically the group starts to ostracize that person organically they get ostracized until they learn that the only way that they will get through this thing the only way they will survive boot camp is if they ask for help because they have no option the problem is no one will help them until they're willing to help another it's the deal we have to make it's called vulnerability and risk we have to take the risk to make ourselves vulnerable yes you might do something for someone else and they may not do something back for you that's the risk you run that's the risk you run it's not about it's not about giving everything to them and and sort of huge big overwhelming risk it's about little things and little things it's like going on a date right it's like if I went on a date with somebody I came home and I said after one date I said I'm marrying her people like what are you nuts I'll be like I'm in love they're like what your this is crazy I'm like I know I'm in love she feels the same way we both know it's nuts right now you know that you're gonna be like go on a couple more dates right we know instinctively that the strong bond that's create that that needs to be created first takes more than a week right we know that right but if I've been dating somebody for seven years and we haven't you know married you'll be like dude what is wrong right in other words we know that it takes more than seven days and we know that it takes less than seven years the problem is we don't know how long it takes somewhere in the middle all human buns are the same like when you show up at work when you show for the first time when you're new don't expect that people will look out for you and they won't expect you to look out for them in seven days it won't happen but if you've been working at a job for a few years and you don't have the UH identity that the sort of the absolute confidence that if you turn your back you will not get stabbed you can rely on somebody who can give them something nothing will go wrong you will share the credit no one will throw you under the bus if you don't have that in a few years something's wrong something's wrong I don't know how long it takes but I know that's more than a week and I know it's less than seven years and the Marines fundamentally understand that before anyone is willing to put themselves out for another they have to have self-confidence real self confidence you have to be confident in yourself and your own ability before you're willing to help another if you're insecure at all about your own ability it's an oxy it's sort of a paradox right how am I can I overcome my confidence you know my self-confidence and we all have ego issues at all times you know we all do right but if I'm not confident myself I won't help another it's a paradox because then we need someone to look out for us before we're willing to help our peers right this is what management is supposed to do the drill instructors the school they are they're our parents they are there for one reason and one reason only to help us feel strong and good about ourselves but look at the way we talk to each other they look at look look a budgets been cut and so what do you get told I need you guys to do more with less right that's what we're told hey guys I need you guys to do more with less that's we're told by our clients by our bosses by our parents this is what we're told right that's like your parents telling you when you're young I know you're stupid figure it out right you're not as smart as the other kids what do you want me to do right it's the exact same thing I need you to do more with less right what we need to be telling people is I need you I need you to do more with what you have right you have capacity you have strength you have talent you have compatibility I need you to do more with what you have we don't celebrate what we've got we criticize for what we don't have this is the responsibility of management to take us under their wing and help us understand our own value to ourselves close your eyes and think back to high school and think of that one teacher who took you under their wing and cared for you and looked after you and helped you realize that you are capable of more than you thought you were and you and you you probably are the person you are today in some part because of that person right do you have that name what's the name tell me the name tell me the name of the teacher okay give me the name okay I can point to anybody and you can tell me that name now tell me the names of all the other teachers you had that day can't remember them can you this is the power of those who teaches confidence we will literally carry their names around with us for the rest of our lives wouldn't you want to be that person wouldn't you want to be the person that 20 years from now 30 years from now 40 years from now I can do this exercise with somebody and they will tell me your name this is the power of helping others realize their own strengths this is what management and leadership is supposed to be doing they're supposed to be caring for us and helping us realize our own value and by the way if you have anybody who reports to your works for you your responsibility is not to make them meet the deadline your responsibility is not to make sure that they do as you say your responsibility is to make sure that they understand their own strengths their own value and that they are way way more talented than they think they are and the only way they will learn that is if you put them in situations in which they can fail and you hold them and you support them and you give them talent and you give them skills and you give them education and you watch their backs and if they fall over you encourage them to get back up and if they follow the you carriage them to get back up and if they fall over you encourage them to get back up until they figure it out themselves it's called confidence it's your responsibility to help others find it into others responsibility to help you find yours and the amazing thing is as soon as you start feeling confident in your own ability you naturally help each other that's what happens it's called trust in the military they give medals to people who are willing to sacrifice themselves so that others may gain in business we are willing to give bonuses to people who will sacrifice others so that we may gain we have it backwards and then we complain about how we don't love our jobs and we complain about how the work is suffering and we complain about how budgets are being cut and we can complain and complain and complain and the first thing we do is blame each other and become more selfish and worried about my pay and my benefits in my this and this is what happens when we are unfulfilled we look at the metrics and we say they're not good enough when we are fulfilled we don't care about the metrics this is why when you have a job you love and you get a call that says I'll offer you tons more money and great benefits you like I'm not interested I'm not interested I I'm not interested I'm very happy here but we'll give you more that's not the reason I'm here I'm here because I love it I'm here because I care for the people I work with and I'm here because the people I work with care for me this is the world I imagine this is the world I imagine and here's the great thing if you take little risks I'm not talking about big things little things if you start doing little things for each other the amazing anthropological response is other people will start doing little things for others - I was walking down the street two days ago and a guy's backpack was open and a whole bunch of paper fell out as he was walking down the street and I happened to be behind him and so my friend and I just sort of we were in mid conversation and in mid conversation we never even stopped talking we just bent down sort of helped him gather his papers and them back to him sort of pointed out that his bet book bag was his you know pack was unzipped and he said thanks and we walked on it was like no big deal right we get to the end of the the street we stand at that we're waiting it to cross the street we still talking we haven't stopped talking and the guy in front of us turns to us and says I saw you help that guy that was really cool but here's what's great about that the guy will go do something for someone else simply because he saw us bend down and pick up paper for someone else he will actually go do something for someone else because of it right he he won't give to charity because he sees me put a dollar in a cup but he will actually help someone because he saw someone also helps someone little things hold a door open for someone say thank you to the person hold the door open for you smile to the barista little little things you know put your foot in the subway when the door is closing so someone who's running will make it hit the open at the elevator don't go or pretend you didn't see that's the best one you know I saw sorry all right do it a little time and a little energy and you'll find around work that people give a little time and a little energy back to you and you'll give a little more time and a little more energy you go for a coffee with someone then you go for a two-hour coffee and you go for a coffee and a lunch then you go for a lunch and a dinner then you go for a dinner in a movie and then you sleep over and then you sleep over two nights and then you go on holiday together and eventually you get married right it's slow it takes time and we can't rush it you know if when we rush it it's all fake do things for others and watch watch how much others do for you but you know go you go get yourself a cup of coffee from the coffee sheet machine in the morning make one for someone else it takes a little extra time it takes a little extra energy that's the point that's the point and here's the best part you will feel so good at the end of the day so good thank you very much thank you it's a great question how do you convince someone how do you know sort of the metrics how do you convince a skeptical audience of this trust metric you don't you don't write you can't twist anybody's arm to do something that they don't want to do and you know the law of diffusion which I obey you know as hard as as much as I can which is you don't need the majority you need those people who believe what you believe in other words if you buy if you you know when you go sort of when you do some nice things for people they may not do something nice back because they may be you know we live in a world in which you do something for somebody they think you want something from them right that's unfortunately the society we've created but but that's the risk that we keep taking I'm not saying you should keep doing it for somebody who keeps doing nothing and keeps sort of you know crapping on you because of it then at some point you have to be like all right my bad my bad right and you back off you know I don't believe in helping everyone I do not believe in it right this is not you know let's do good for everyone in the planet that's not what I'm talking about mother Teresa who's the poster child for giving selflessly to all who need at the end of her life started question the existence of God and by the way hated her life serious okay in other words giving to others unabashedly is actually self-destructive it doesn't help right and it's just like going on dates with people you don't like doesn't mean you'll eventually click in math right there's there's only one machine that I found that really accurately measures trust better than any other sort of metric it's called a human being it's really good at it right and so those feelings you get trust them and one way or the other you know it's it's the little risks it's the butterflies it's the unsure you know it's the it's the backwards it's the dance it's dating it's the dance it's the nerves like I you know it's that so if there if there are cynical bastards at your office who or who don't get it you cannot ignore him don't worry about it because eventually you'll get enough and those people either come along or leave or be pushed out you know ostracized remember when the group starts helping each other they sighs the ones who refuse to help whether they're stronger whether they're weak they get ostracized until they learn until they learn that they cannot survive without the help of others and they learn that the only way others will help them is if they if they help the others right the order matters the order matters I'll just I just thought of something that that's sort of we which is pervasive in our sort of you know digital world the order matters you know so to speak honestly about what you want right if you are doing don't do things for people when you want something from them just ask them what you want from them and I'll give you one little example it's a funny little example we've all received emails that go like this dear Simon well you wouldn't get an email to your assignment but I dear insert your name right dear Simon haven't seen you in years hope you're well congratulations on all you've been doing it's really amazing we should get coffee sometime if you could do me a favor I'm if you could vote for me on this website I'm hoping to win you know some thousand dollar prize for my design blah blah blah hope you're well talk to you soon Kenny right we've all received an email like that and how do we respond to it right now what happens if you get the same email that goes like this dear Simon I'm hoping you could vote for me on this website I'm trying to win some thousand dollar prize for my design I haven't seen you in years I hope you're really well congratulations on all that you've been doing we should get a coffee sometime thanks Kenny totally different in other words when we know why you're emailing and it comes first it has a remarkable impact we know that all those pleasantries are just buttering us up to get to what they want right but if you come right out with what you want we're actually very grateful for the pleasantries right it's the same thing in human interaction don't give someone a cup of coffee if you need a favor back just ask them for the favor it builds trust I can't trust you every time you do something nice for me I think you just something what you want something from me I won't trust you and this is what companies do to us right well we did this for you why won't you do this for us that's not how it works generosity bending down to pick up the papers holding the door open for someone is expecting nothing in return ever you do not give you know this is what happens in new business right we new business is built on relationships and so we build the relationship build the relationship build a relationship until we're comfortable to ask for the business in other words you were only befriending me till the point you felt that I would let down my guard and you could ask me for something the whole time you were just waiting for that time it doesn't work that way if you actually want to build relationships you build relationships without wanting anything and that's how you build trust you want to know why the Marines gave me this incredible access I mean literally they said Simon anything you want to see you got it anything you want to do you got it you can go ahead we went past sign that said no observers no civilians beyond this point I'm like can I take pictures like go ahead you should see some of the pictures they're unbelievable right I'm like right in there Marines coming at me we went out to the crucible and roll like you know they're like rolling in the dirt and like you know going onto barbed wire and I'm like I'm not joking either they're like you know unprecedented access access that journalists would be jealous of do you know why they gave it to me because in all the time that I've been visiting with Marines and having meetings with them I've never asked for anything I don't want anything and I don't have anything to sell I just keep showing up and say what do you need how can I help and at some point they said when I called and said I need a little favor because they know I haven't been waiting for the favor it's the time now that I have a little favor they go absolutely whatever you need it's called human relationships companies don't do business with companies people do business with people you know your company didn't win IBM as a client somebody who likes somebody said will hire you and if they didn't like you they're just you know they're doing they're playing roulette while we're betting that you know this will work out those are the weak relationships yes [Music] the more we give the more it inspires others to give but the more selfish we are the more others become selfish around us and so those are organizations in which selfish behavior perfect prevails and so we see the residual effect which is they make decisions that ultimately screw us they destroy our economy because of their selfish behavior right we know this is what what what happens same in politics right and the answer is don't worry about it I know it sounds silly I need you out you mean your first question is do I talk about these things to them I will talk to anyone who will listen you know but I don't talk to people who don't want to listen the good news is there are some good eggs and there are some of them who've had conversions where they were the bastards who believed in firing people and screwing people to advance their careers and something happens I just met a guy recently he was a very senior executive at very very large company and something happened and he like he got like hit in the head or something and he realized holy cow I have to look after people right and they become obsessed with it and they start sticking their necks out and and we just need those champions scattered around and this is what I do the more I spread this message the more it's sort of it's it's kind of like um you know in the cartoons is sort of the whole of justice you know the the message goes out they all sort of like you know wherever they are like you know that they poke their heads up it's that kind of thing the more we talk about it the more we put it in our work you know because don't forget you're gonna help someone who goes home feeling good and their husband or their wife works in the bank and they're gonna talk how much about they'd love to and that might inspire that person you know it's it has all of these residual impacts that we don't really know this is the funny thing about the internet which is we're so proud of the internet that we can measure everything no you can't you can only measure one layer right so for example you say Simon what's the impact you're having I don't know is the answer right I know it's it's I know that it'll take more than a week and I will take seven years but I don't know when it's gonna happen and I don't know how it's gonna get there right all I can do is is do it right but I have no clue how we'll win and so for example I can measure book sales and I can measure how many hits and I can measure how many people watched a TED talk and all of this but I can't measure you know that TED talk being shown to a room of 50 people and one of those 50 people doesn't buy a book doesn't watch a TED talk doesn't do anything but goes out and does something good for somebody else I have no way of measuring that and so we're so proud of the internet and its ability to measure everything but we're measuring one layer where we used to measure no layers it's like you know this is how people work it's it's it's gossamer you know it's networked and so the answer is don't worry about them don't worry about them worry about the people who you can care for who you can give to and when we reach a critical mass in society it will tip right and if you don't believe me the reason it is the way it is now is because it tipped the wrong way there was no such thing as massive layoffs as business strategy prior to night in the 1980s it just wasn't done it was done here and there but it wasn't strategy the idea of using layoffs to balance the books is a relatively new phenomenon that came for the increase of selfishness in the Gordon Gekko greta's good 1980s boom right and this was also the same exact period the 1980s where the theory the theory of shareholder value was put forwards right because they had all these people buying large companies and installing professional managers to run the companies that they bought that they invested in and they had a problem which is those professional managers were paid for by the company and those professional managers cared for the employees and the customers and so the investor said how do we protect our we've got an idea we're gonna give them equity in the company and bonus them based on the performance right and so the shift happened where the CEOs started caring more about the investors and stopped caring about the customers and employees those were theories introduced by some Harvard professor in the 1980s we can push it back the other way right we can push it back the other way but we just have to and there's just there's a there was a just the other day which company was it one of the large banks where the shareholders citibank citibank yeah citibank the shareholders voted majority shareholders voted against a fat pay package that's unprecedented it has never happened even in hard times even when the company's doing this the shareholders just it's just sort of a cursory thing where they approve the fifteen million dollar bonus for the CEO they voted against it it's non-binding but it sends a shot across the bow saying shareholders now want you to be bonused if you do something good for others even if the others is us all right the point is is that it's it's starting to crack and so let's just stick our finger in the crack you know make sure that it keeps cracking it's one one way we can swing it back the question was can I talk about celebrating accomplishment while still asking for more right tutu so so they did a study on kids who are really really smart like an older gifted classes why is it when you smart you're gifted when you're stupid you're special why is that I was told my whole life I was special I never gifted they took the gifted kids who were constantly told you're so good oh thanks but I knew you'd do well oh you're the you're our best employee you know you're our best student you're awesome right and what happens is later in life they actually suffer because they're very afraid of taking risk because they're very afraid of losing their position on the mantle okay kids who are sort of more average who constantly are rewarded not for their accomplishment but for their effort great effort really proud of the improvement you made what they find is they do very well in life because there's no shelf there's always more there's more effort right and so you want to reward and acknowledge effort even if they don't hit the goal it's that the Delta but at the same time if it goes backwards you'd be like dude what's going on it's like we don't get we shouldn't be giving ribbons for everyone who competes right because what we're teaching people is if you do nothing you get a medal right and the funny thing is is we start with creating a generation that's feeling very Hollow and feeling you know this sense of entitlement that people complain about gen-y the entitlement is I don't feel like I've accomplished anything and the funny thing is about human beings is we we the way we feel accomplished is when we exert energy and time and reach a destination right and the more energy and time that we have to suffer through especially if we suffer together and we get somewhere it is overwhelming think about the best jobs you've ever worked on was it the best design was it the best results that the company because of your your project or was it an absolute hell project that you work together and you came out on the other end and that you got it done at the deadline and you're like that was amazing it was the hell projects it was the things that we had to go out of our ways more do things for each other right things we weren't thinking of doing I was wrapping packages I was doing stuff that aren't designers aren't supposed to do going you know this is what produces that right and so the the the the the thing is about measurement and destination reward imagine we're standing in a big empty room right and we're standing in one corner and I give you a simple instruction I want you to go to that corner in a straight line right I figure out no big deal right without telling you I slip a chair in front of you what do you do you go around the chair now you just disobeyed what I told you to do I told you to go to that corner straight line but this is the amazing things about human beings which is when we're given a clear destination we use our own creativity and our own sense of innovation and our own problem-solving abilities to overcome obstacles to get to the destination in other words the destination is more important than the route right we are flexible about the route we're obsessed with the destination reset we're standing in the corner together and I give you a simple instruction go somewhere in this room in a straight line and you say to me well where do you owe me to go I'm like I don't know you smart figure it out go in a straight line and so you pick a point and you start walking and without telling you I put a chair in front of you and what do you do you come to a grinding halt I say what did you stop for you go will you put a chair in front of me or you'll make a sudden turn and go in another direction right and this is the problem it's the same obstacle the difference is when you have a clear set a clear destination the obstacles become easy to overcome when you don't have a clear destination you keep coming to a grinding halt and what we do in our companies is we're counting the steps we're taking along the route but we're never looking at the destination right so company says made in million dollars this year we were only planning on making eight hundred thousand like we took ten steps were only planning on taking eight where are you going no clue right we count the steps and so the point is is that people want to feel that the effort that they're exerting actually are moving somewhere and so successful measurement successful recognition is not just for the steps you take it's not just for the effort it's that the effort you exerted moved us closer to where we're trying to get to and that get to should be some crazy ideal my ideal is to live in a world in which the vast majority of people wake up every single morning you know inspire to go to work and fulfilled by the work that they do and the the couple of measurements that I use are if the book is selling and I by the way people ask me how many have you sold I have no clue I've never asked the publisher because they don't care I really don't care how many I've sold what I care about is the Amazon rankings and that those are going steady or up and not plummeting because that means other people right because I don't have a publicist I don't have a marketing strategy on purpose I didn't hire one of those companies to sell the book for me and the reason is is because I'm not interested in book sales I'm interested in spreading an idea and so I just use that as a metric to help me understand am I sort of marching in that because the more I preach is it resonating you know and so you have a couple of these imperfect measurements that help you understand are you going along the way so it's not just great effort look what you achieved because that's what we're doing now right our goal is to increase top-line revenues by 50 million dollars for what reason right which is we have to know the destination and then we say amazing you took us that much closer and if we go to the right it's because we were overcoming an obstacle if we hadn't gone to the right we would have been stuck forever thank you you know it's not always straight lines it's not always straight lines but it's it's in one direction she's pulling the cane out thank you very very much

Know ThySelf Channel

UNLOCK The POWER Of Your MIND! See It On YouTube Know Thyself – A YouTube Channel Transforming Self-Discovery YouTube is a platform teeming with content of every imaginable variety. Among these, a channel

Read More »
Self Love

Self Love: Fall In Love With You

Mind Motivation Coaching Shared This About Self Love Unlocking Self-Love: Insights from Influential Speakers In a world where self-worth often gets entangled with external validations, prominent speakers remind us of the essence of

Read More »

Friedrich Nietzsche

Friedrich Nietzsche: Philosopher of Individualism and Existentialism Friedrich Nietzsche, a 19th-century German philosopher, is renowned for his profound and provocative ideas on morality, existentialism, and the human condition. Through his writings, Nietzsche challenged

Read More »

Rich Roll Podcast

Unlocking Wellness: The Rich Roll Podcast The Rich Roll Podcast is a dynamic platform hosted by Rich Roll, a renowned ultra-endurance athlete, wellness advocate, and bestselling author. Through engaging conversations with a diverse

Read More »

How to throw a knife

Knife Throwing Tips & Tricks: Throwing a knife can be a fun and challenging skill to learn, but it requires practice, patience, and safety precautions. Here’s a basic guide on how to throw

Read More »

Andy Frisella (75 Hard Book & App)

Andy Frisella: Transforming Lives Through Grit, Discipline, and Resilience Meet Andy Frisella, a leading figure in the world of personal development, entrepreneurship, and mindset mastery. With his no-nonsense approach and unwavering commitment to

Read More »